Tips For Sleeping With Your Dog
compiled from the VizslaTalk list
1. Make sure when cuddling with your dog at 2 a.m. that you do not
accidentally lay on the dog's face. The dog cannot breathe, and will commence to
wiggling, which will greatly disturb your slumber.
2. Always take your pillow to with you when making nocturnal bathroom visits.
Otherwise, you will be laying on your arm when you return, as the dog will not
be willing to return your pillow. (Dogs firmly believe in possession being
nine-tenths of the law)
3. Prepare to wake up on the floor in the morning. Or at least be willing to get
up, and go around to the other side of the bed, to resume sleeping on the
mattress. Don't attempt to make the dog move over, this will not happen.
4. When the alarm goes off, shut it off quickly, as the noise disturbs your dog.
5. Make sure when you go to bed, you have 100% of the covers, by morning you
will have none, and will be laying in a fetal position trying to stay warm.
6. When the dog lays it's nose next to yours, and gazes deeply into your eyes,
bury your head in the pillow, because it is getting ready to sneeze in your
7. Repositioning an uncooperative sleeping vizsla on your bed is akin to
trying to move wet concrete!
8. In order to avoid pillow-possession issues - take dog WITH you during
nocturnal bathroom visits.
9. If you feel a need to close the bathroom door as you head back to bed -
make sure you have not locked the V in the bathroom - they make a horrid
noise when abandoned in this manner.
10. After you have made the down payment on the SUV to carry the V's, you
might invest in a king-sized bed - it greatly reduces the human-on-the-floor
11. In lieu of a king-size bed - long fingernails facilitate hanging on to
the side of the mattress for a good night's sleep- its actually quite
comfortable once you get used to it.
12. If you take the top blanket and throw it OVER the dog at bed time it
seems to restrict the migration to the head of the bed. Unfortunately it may
give the human a heart attack when awaking to find a blanket clad, tail
wagging apparition standing in the middle of the bed.
13. When nature calls and your bird-dog needs to go outside in the
middle of a rainy, stormy night: check all V mouths when they return to the
house, unless you want to wake up with a wet and bedraggled feathered
friend in your bed!
14. Be prepared to rearrange your own bed linens and theirs several
times per night.
15. Make friends with your washer and dryer . . . . you'll be seeing a lot
of them. Also, buy laundry detergent in LARGE quantities. Oh, watch
out for the dryer sheets, too--the dog who finds one unattended is
like a kid with the toy from a box of Cracker Jacks!
16. You should budget your sleep carefully so that when your V jumps down from
the bed and runs around to the other side expecting you to lift up the covers so
she can snake her way down to your feet three or four times per night that you
are not interrupting too much REM sleep!
17. Older dog has lazy susan in his middle. No matter where you move him, his
center point remains in the exact same spot.
18. Younger dog is a hotbox, so the furnace has to be turned down. Extra
blankets have to be purchased to keep children warm because they now do not
sleep with the dog. Moral: Don't go to bed first.
19. When sleeping with husband, I had monochrome snoring; sleeping with husband
and one dog resulted in snoring in stereo; husband and 2 dogs now gives me
surround sound snoring. It helps to have a spare bedroom.
20. Never go to the bathroom in the middle of the night unless you want to take
older dog for a walk because he can't make it down the back steps, and the
younger dog immediately thinks it's time to eat. All of this results in being
fully awake. Husband either sleeps through this entire episode, or it wakes him
and he's grumpy.
21. If by some chance you can sneak out of the bed without disturbing anyone,
better just settle in the lounge chair because there will be absolutely no space
whatsoever in the bed. Everyone stretches out. If you push your way back in, you
end up with a fully washed face and a 50 lb. dog lying on you trying to get fed
early. I, too, have considered the entire room one large mattress.
22. You never have cold feet again! :o)